As we walked down to see her doctor, I bumped into a lady I had met at one of our prayer meetings, she had a baby bump, we exchanged pleasantries and moved on.
When I got back to her, she said I wish I was the one with that baby bump so I could rest from all this pressure. I smiled and told her that wasn't a pregnancy she had fibroid and has been living with it for years because her doctor had told her that if she had surgery she could bleed to death.
Immediately she went cold.
Let's be watchful of what we wish on ourselves because of pressure from people and society.
I remember when It was a year into my marriage, I started getting comments like "Iyawo, when are we coming to eat dedication rice" I know a lot of wives can relate to what I am saying.
At a point, those comments started to yield seeds in my thought, I began to question myself if I was medically okay. If I was, what about my husband, maybe he is not medically fit.
Rather than resist the pressure I joined in pressurizing myself. Then I started the rat race running from pillar to post looking for what no man can give.
All this because of a comment somebody made that I let get into my heart. Meanwhile, nothing was wrong.
Take a break from mounting pressure on yourself and your marriage.
She got pregnant during her honeymoon. Great for her, your circle and hers are not the same, you can still get pregnant anytime.
She used oral conception to space her kids with two years intervals, It seems that is the standard I would do the same. Wow, that is nice, do you have the same body structure and hormones?
Her baby is chubby she feeds her with Gerber baby cereal, I will love my baby to look that way.
Hmm, can you afford it consistently?
He fly's his wife to Canada to birth his children, why can't my husband do the same after all they work in the same office.
Aunty, does he carry the responsibility your husband carries?
I heard a story in church of a lady who wanted to avoid the pressure that comes with not being pregnant after marriage, so after six months she began to take any fertility drug she heard works, she took in but did not know for five months and kept taking the drugs, thank God nothing happened to her and her child.
You might not be so lucky like her, learn to resist pressure after marriage, the noise is so loud but you can control what you absorb in, don't let pressure steal away your peace or life.
Why do we pressurize people to do our bit?
A couple just celebrated their first anniversary and you are already asking when will we come for dedication?
Let me help them answer some.
Some have medical conditions they are battling with day in day out.
Some have spiritual battles they are fighting.
Some are excellently fine but are waiting for God's time.
Why is there so much pressure? Is not like you will carry the pregnancy or pay the hospital bill or carter for the child.
What happened to live and let's live?